As intimate wedding and elopement photographers, one of the things we hear most from our couples is that they want to have a private elopement that focuses on the two of them, but they also want a celebration with their loved ones.
So often, couples think that they have to choose one or the other, but the great thing about eloping is that you can create whatever type of experience you want with whoever you want. In this blog we’re going over elopements vs intimate weddings – what’s the difference and can you really have both? Keep reading to find out.
What is an Elopement?
Weddings are often associated with words like “tradition”, “love”, or “celebration” while elopements are often associated with words like “secret”, “small”, “lonely”, and “courthouse”. But what does it really mean to elope, and how are elopements different from traditional weddings?
The definition of elopement has changed a lot over the years. Today, the word is less about getting married in secrecy and more about planning an intentional wedding experience. It’s about planning a day that lets go of other’s expectations, and instead, focuses on the love you share with your partner.
Because there is no one way to elope, elopements come in different forms. You can choose to elope with just the two of you, or with a handful of family and friends.
You can choose to travel somewhere meaningful to your relationship or a destination completely new to start your marriage on an adventurous note.
You can choose to stay in a cabin in the woods, or hike up or take a helicopter ride up the mountains to share your vows. The day is truly yours.
What is an Intimate Wedding?
If your wedding vision prioritizes your experience with your guests, then we at Henry Tieu Photography consider this an intimate wedding (note – every photographer might consider this a bit differently). This could mean spending more time together while getting ready or hosting a reception meal to celebrate after the ceremony.
Elopement vs Intimate Wedding: How Many Guests Do They Include?
Oftentimes, photographers will define an elopement or intimate wedding by its size. For us, elopements and intimate weddings are less about the number of people and more about the experience you want to create.
Because of this we sometimes use the terms “elopement” and “intimate wedding” interchangeably.
No matter which experience you want to have, we typically define both intimate weddings and elopements as weddings with up to 30 guests. For us, the biggest difference between the two is how you plan your day and what types of experiences you want to prioritize.
Location Preference
Wondering where to hold an elopement or intimate wedding ceremony? No matter what type of wedding you plan, the good news is that your elopement or intimate wedding can take place anywhere…well, almost anywhere.
If you are eloping with just you and your partner, you can choose to hike up in the mountains to your dream location or exchange vows at your cabin in the forest.
If you are eloping with guests, your location options can be a bit more limited depending on how many people you invite. One thing to keep in mind when choosing a location for your intimate wedding are any physical limitations for you or your guests. You can still get married outdoors at a beautiful location, we may just have to find a venue or outdoor location that can accommodate everyone’s needs.
*Pro Tip – For wedding days that use public space (National Parks, State Parks, etc…), there are often restrictions from the governing office. Therefore, in order to follow the rules and preserve the intimate setting of your intentional experience, we recommend having a guest size of 30 or less. We understand that sometimes, you might want to have more than 30 guests. If that’s the case, let us know and we can guide you on finding a venue that can accommodate all your loved ones.
Elopement vs Intimate Wedding: How Much Do They Cost?
With weddings – just as with anything else in life – people have different budgets. How much you choose to spend on your elopement or intimate wedding truly comes down to what you value.
While both elopements and intimate weddings can cost less than traditional weddings, that does not mean they are “cheap”. Most likely, you will still need to spend money on things like:
- Photographer
- Wedding dress / attire
- Permit / License
- Officiant
- Flowers
- Hair and Make Up
- Caterers / Food for Guests (if you decide to have some)
- Cake
- Event Planner (some elopements with guests might need an elopement planner)
- Travel and Accommodation
This list can add up quickly.
The biggest difference between costs for an elopement vs an intimate wedding really comes down to how many guests you decide to invite. The more guests, the higher you can expect to pay.
Typically, the overall cost of an elopement will be lower due to fewer vendors, logistics, food, decor, etc. With intimate weddings, you may need additional services such as catering or a personal chef which can add most cost to your overall budget.
To learn more about the cost of an elopement or intimate wedding, check out our blog on How Much Does it Cost to Elope?
Elopement vs Intimate Wedding: What’s the Difference?
The main difference between an elopement vs an intimate wedding comes down to the type of experience you want to have.
If your wedding day prioritizes your time with each other, we consider this to be an elopement, whereas if it focuses on hosting your guests, that is an intimate wedding.
Questions to Ask to Decide What Kind of Experience You Want to Have
When deciding whether to have an elopement vs an intimate wedding, there are a few questions you can ask yourself to decide what kind of experience you want to have.
Our biggest advice is to sit down with your fiance and close your eyes. Take turns describing what you envision for your wedding day. Don’t think about logistics or anything else. Just describe what you see.
If you need a little help to get started, here are some questions you can answer together.
- Who do we see standing there witnessing our vows?
- Where exactly is the spot? Are you in a field of flowers or on top of a mountain somewhere?
- Is there anyone we can’t imagine celebrating our wedding day without?
- Does the thought of planning an elopement with guests sound stressful?
- How do we want to feel on our wedding day?
- What activities do we want to include?
- What do we value most?
Elopement vs Intimate Wedding: Can You Have Both?
Still not sure if you can choose an elopement vs an intimate wedding? The good news is that you don’t have to! You can have both!
Deciding who to invite to your wedding or elopement can be a big decision. Oftentimes, couples who don’t want to limit their experience decide to plan a two-day elopement instead. Two-day elopements give you the best of both worlds! Day one can be your big wedding day where you spend time celebrating with your guests, and day two can be for just the two of you.
Melissa and Tom did exactly that during their coastal wedding on the Oregon Coast. After getting ready with their family, they exchanged private vows overlooking the ocean. Then after a beach ceremony and reception lunch with their loved ones, they headed back out for a private sunset adventure.
So did Amanda and Andrew. For their backpacking elopement in the North Cascades, the couple woke up early to hike into the mountains for a private first look and personal vows. Afterward, they met up with their loved ones for a sunset ceremony and reception dinner to celebrate.
Samantha and Jake planned a two-day wedding in Banff. The first day included a big ceremony and reception with their loved ones, and the next day, the three of us ventured into the mountains where the couple got to share private vows during sunset. See part 1 and part 2 from this couple’s multi-day wedding here on the blog!
Advantages of an Elopement
Advantages of an Intimate Wedding
For more elopement vs intimate wedding inspiration, check out some other weddings from our beautiful couples.
Your elopement can and should be everything you want, so feel free to get creative and come up with ideas that fit your vision for the day! And, if you need help, we’re happy to help provide suggestions during the planning process. Click the button below to reach out. We’d love to help you plan an elopement, intimate wedding, or anything in between!
Meet Your Intimate Wedding & Elopement Photographers
We’re Henry and Sergio, the faces behind these honest, meaningful, and artful photographs of couples eloping in the most beautiful places. Since 2018, we’ve photographed more than 200+ intimate weddings and elopements all over the world and on 6 different continents. Our work has been published on Junebug Weddings, Green Wedding Shoes, Brides, Dancing With Her, etc…We’ve won international awards for best wedding photos but what’s most important to us is actually winning our clients’ hearts with our art.
With 15 years of combined photography experience, we’ve learned that the only way to a beautiful wedding experience & photos is through intentionality.
We’re here for you and with you from “let’s do this” to “I do”, one step at a time, each step of the way. We’re in this together
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